|Script for Brownies|
- (Pat comes over to Jake with a plate of brownies)
- Pat: Jake, the, uh, brownies are done.
- Jake: Special brownies?
- Pat: Yeah.
- Jake: Nice. (Takes a brownie)
- Pat: Just take one. (Walks past Amir)
- Amir: Ahh. Not so fast, comprende.
- Pat: Doesn't that mean comprehend?
- Amir: Yeah. Send it. (Takes a brownie)
- Jake: Hey Amir, don't eat those.
- Amir: Come on.
- Pat: Have one.
- Amir: Oh, am I gonna spoil my lunch, moms? Don't worry, I had ice cream for breakfast. (Stuffing brownies into his mouth) Gimme gimme smore, gimme smore. Gimme gimme gimme gimme...
- (A surreal montage commences, showing Amir doing various things while stoned, with Gimme More playing. It ends with a large whiteboard falling on Amir, crushing him and sending blood spraying. A D.A.R.E. logo is beside the blood. It transitions to Amir sitting at Jake's desk telling the story to Jake.)
- Amir: "No!" and SBFFF! My head just explodes, so sick.
- Jake: It's really sick. It's just incredibly morbid. Don't think about anti-drug commercials at work, okay, just do your real actual work.
- Amir: (Slaps Jake) You're fired.