|Script for Miami - Part 2 (Driving)|
- (Sam and Amir are driving. Both are asleep. They get woken up by a car honk.)
- Amir: Ahh! Ugh, come on! Ugh, focus!
- Sam: So what's the plan? We get to Maimi? We find Jake, you and he become best friends, we all get matching tattoos?
- Amir: Woah woah woah, what do you mean you and he "become" best friends? We already are.
- Sam: Alright! For the tattoos I'm thinking "Jake and Amir Foreva".
- Amir: No, Sam.
- Sam: "No Sam".
- Amir: No, I want it to say "No, Sam".
- Sam: It would be an honor.
- (Jake is in Miami, leaving a message for Jamie!)
- Jake: Hey! Uh, Jamie. It's Jake. Uh look, I'm down in Miami for work, um... down here like on a job—
- Passerby: Yeah, a blowjob.
- Jake: No—sorry that wasn't me. Though I wouldn't turn one down. No, I—well, I mean, I wouldn't turn one down, but I would only accept it if you really wanted to, and we were both, like, getting along, and I would return the favor many times over. Okay, um, I'm sorry, this is getting really long. I should just go. There's not an option to re-record, is there. (Tries something on his phone, but it apparently doesn't work) No, there's not. Okay. So yeah, uh, Jake, in Miami, give me a call back, bye. (Hangs up, and calls again) Hey, uh, Jamie look. Jake again. For the first time. Uh, someone crazy stole my phone. Uh, so yeah. But I am in Miami though, so just...
- (Back with Amir and Sam)
- Amir: We're out of gas! What the heck, it says E!
- Sam: Yeah, E stands for "not enough gas", idiot!
- Amir: So what's F?
- Sam: "Fine, for now, gaswise". The tank is fine.
- Amir: Dang it! Ugh, god, this sucks!
- Sam: I guess we could hitchhike.
- Amir: What, are you crazy? We're gonna get murdered.
- Sam: No no no, it's the hitchhikers that do the murdering.
- Sam and Amir: (Jubilantly) We're gonna murder people!