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Script for Office Fantasy
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EpisodeEdit

Amir: Jake, question. Is it Jake with one 'j'?
Jake: Yeah, one 'j'.
Amir: That's it?
Jake: There's an 'a' and a 'k'—
Amir: Okay there's an 'a' and a 'k'... slow down! What order is everything in?
Jake: What is wrong with you?
(Julia (Julia Allison) enters and shakes Jake's hand)
Julia: Hi, I'm Julia from HR.
Jake: Oh hi. Nice to meet you!
(Music starts playing and the screen goes pink around around the edges. Julia lets down her hair gets onto Jake's lap.)
Julia: You're amazing.
Jake: Second best to Amir, but thanks.
Julia: I have an island off the coast of Nebraska; wanna run away with me?
Jake: Cannay do that, sister. Amir's my BBF [sic] and I don't go anywhere without him.
Julia: Don't you wanna rub your toes all over my breasts?
Jake: Of course I do, that's the most hot normal fantasy ever, everyone knows that.
(The pink border goes away, and Amir is leaning back in his seat, eyes rolled back and mouth wide open)
Julia: Is he okay?
Jake: Uh, yeah. He actually does that all the time.
(The pink border comes back)
Jake: And it's pretty much awesome! (High fives Amir)
(The pink border goes away. Amir, still fantasizing, high fives the air. The pink border comes back.)
Jake: Amir can do a backflip, he just won't show us cause he's too shy.
Julia: Kiss me.
Jake: Amir beat me at arm wrestling three times today.
Julia: No he didn't.
Jake: Two out of three and he used both hands, but that's legal.
Julia: No it's not!
Jake: Amir!
(The pink border goes away)
Amir: Jake!
Julia: Are you okay?
Amir: He doesn't want to go to that island with you, you fucking biznatch!
Ricky: Amir!
(Amir tilts his head back and fantasizes)
Ricky: I want you to go camping with Jake in the Ice Cream Forest.

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