Script for Realizations
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Sarah: Oh, hey Amir. Uh, I heard you and Mike are really hitting it off.
Amir: That's a bit of an understatement, don't you think?
Sarah: Are, are you gay?
Amir: What?! God, no. Why?
Sarah: I mean, you know Mike's gay?
Amir: OK, I'm not going to stand here and listen to you talk smack behind his back.
Sarah: Amir, it's not a bad thing.
Amir: Yes, Sarah, it is. Gay means bad, like if I wanted to insult your shoes and they were bad or whatever I'd be like "Hey, you have gay shoes". You have gay shoes.
Sarah: Amir, gay means homosexual.
Amir: I know. What does that mean?
Sarah: It means that Mike wants to have sex with you.
Amir: So you think Mike's a woman? Trust me, he's not.
Mike: Oh hey guys.
Amir: Oh hey Mike. I was just leaving.
Mike: Hey Amir, do you want to go to the bathroom together?
Amir: Sure, meet you in the men's room.
Mike: Same stall?
Amir: For sure.

(New scene: Jake is in California jogging on the beach when Amir's voice comes up on his iPod)
Amir: Hey Jake, it's Amir, I hope you don't mind, I put this song on your iPod. It's about your name so... J is Jake and A is for apple, nothing starts with K, and E is for elephant. I just thought of something that starts with K, it's carrot, yo it's carrot!


(Continuing from end of episode)
Amir: This next one's like a hard core rap song, so maybe turn down your iPod. Yow! Motherfu—

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