Script for Tattoo
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Amir: Ughhhhh...
Jake: What’s going on?
Amir: I don't know how people do it.
Jake: Yeah.
Amir: No, you don't know what I meant. I meant, I don't know how people get tattoos.
Jake: Man. What time do we have that meeting? It's like, 4? Or 2?
Amir: Just forget about the meeting, how—when you got your tattoo, did it hurt you? Who else has a tattoo in the office? Now that I'm inked up.
Jake: I don't really...
Amir: Now that I have ink.
Jake: Do you know, just like, when—
Amir: You're treating me so different now that you know I have a tattoo.
Jake: I'm really trying not to.
Amir: It's embarrassing telling you this shit because I don't—I don't want—
Jake: You don't have to. What is it of?
Amir: I dunno, it's a tattoo. Okay, what is this? (Doodles a sort of backwards α on the whiteboard) What is that of? That's not of anything, it's still a tattoo.
Jake: That looks like a fish or something. Is that what you got?
Amir: Mine's a bear. Okay?
Jake: A bear? Where is it? Where did you—?
Amir: I dunno, in the woods or something.
Jake: When you get a tattoo, you get it of something and in a specific spot. So, it's of a bear, you said, and where is it?
Amir: Let's get—let's go to a fucking bar. I haven't felt this interrogated—(Jake lifts up Amir's sleeve) get—it's not on my shoulder or anything, it's just like on my area. What does it matter?
Jake: What area?
Amir: What does it matter where it is?
Jake: Let me see it!
(Amir quickly displays his abdomen)
Jake: Is that a dick on your—?
Amir: Is that a dick? No, it's a cannon. Leave me alone, it's—it's getting sore.
Jake: Let me fucking see that!
(Jake wrestles Amir to the ground and lifts up his shirt to see the tattoo)
Amir: Get off of me, man. Get off of me, what does it matter what it is?
Jake: It says 'GAY'!
Amir: Those are my initials! Next one's gonna be, like, an eagle.

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